The Man Purse

haikvr

10 years ago

Way back in 2000, I first heard about man purse in a Seinfeld episode and had a good laugh. Little more than a decade later, I find myself using one. Here is me defending in the court on why I use a man purse.

Your Honour, Men needed just a few essentials those days. A purse/wallet + keys, a mobile phone + a hand kerchief and a comb on the back pocket. Real men don’t need to carry a pocket note book. They write stuff and lose it behind credit card acknowledgements.

If you were a metrosexual male then you will need a deo, a face wash, a mouth freshner, a hair gel, a hair spray, a hand sanitizer, a hand moisturiser, a sunscreen etc. – you would have dragged all these in a suitcase – and guys like you would have been husbanded soon and you will still be dragging that suitcase but with the kids diaper or the missus’s stuff. I am digressing. Back to the defence.

Some men carry a book to impress women but then it is best carried in hand – otherwise what is the point.

Then iPods came. And we could still squeeze it in along with the cell phone. And on vacation men will typically wear those cargo pants with pockets near the kneecap and can carry a point and shoot, extra 8MB memory cards and even spare batteries. Not a problem.

Then Steve jobs re-invented the phone and for a brief time I thought – wow – now I can carry my phone, iPod, book, music, camera – all in one. Back to good old 2 pocket days.

I was so wrong.

With more power, comes poor battery life. While on the road, heavy GPS Usage, or even reading and responding to emails on the move would drain battery and the phone will not last even half a day.

So had to carry a battery backup, charger, and the cable.

Then I started using the iPad and fell in love with it. It is so convenient to respond to emails, read a book, or a magazine or play those gorgeous games.. and I could not fold it and put it inside my pocket.

Then I saw how women were enjoying a blissful life carrying all the paraphernalia in their hand bags. Same time I spotted hipsters carrying those smart man purses and got tempted. Perhaps I should get one too.

After I moved to Mumbai I felt liberated. No one gave a hoot to what you were doing. All are so engrossed in inventing an excuse for arriving late for a meeting – they do not have time to glance at you and pass a judgement.

I kept looking – most looked like a laptop bag, or the sales man tried to sell a woman’s handbag.. and finally found the one made for me in a Hi Design Store.

Now it carries a lot many things – my bike papers, keys, smart cards, reserve cash, battery backup, battery backup’s backup, iPad, headphones, balaclava, cables, mouth fresher, deo… and so many that I am almost in the territory of a metrosexual man.

It gives a sense of peace – which is hard to describe. Your honour you have to experience this bliss. When you know your phone and iPad are fully charged and you can wait forever in a mall while the missus shops, or when waiting to pick up someone from the airport – you can listen to music without worry of draining the battery, or read a book, or write a blog post – like this one.

The defence rests its case. Hope the court will forgive me for laughing at the Man purse back in 2000.

And to my Man friends, get a Man Purse – why should women have all the fun!